Sunday, June 03, 2012

Author Monday--With Sandy Blair

Today we welcome guest author Sandy Blair to Author Monday. Be sure to check out her contest link at the end of the post and her new book which will be released in print tomorrow.

TALES FROM THE CAVES #2: The Scot’s and mine

For those who missed Tale #1, there’s a charming, loyal, witty but frugal 6 foot, 4 ½ inch Scot living in the basement. He calls it his man cave.

Awhile back I was up in my light and airy cave banging away on the computer tracking down pirated copies of my books when The Scot came in and placed a lovely green apple martini on my desk. Grinning, he said, “I heard you cursing up here and thought you could use this right about now.” How lovely was that?!

At dinner he says, “I have to tell you something but first you have to promise not to get mad.”  

Hmm. First he brings me a martini and now he has something to tell me? Knowing he’ll remain mute until I promise, I lie. “I promise.”

“You know your broken vacuum cleaner?”

He’s referring to the supposedly indestructible, half-ton Rikar I paid a small fortune for 5 years ago, which could once suck paint off walls, but was now held together with duct tape and refused to even turn on.

“Yes, what about it?”  I’m worried he’s done me a favor and brought the monster to the repair shop again. Not good, since I quietly gave myself a new Dyson for Christmas, (Woot!) my 20th such device in our marriage, but my perchance for destroying vacuum cleaners is another story…

“Well,” he says, “I saw that old guy sitting outside his apartment tinkering again and thought he might be able to fix it.”

Oh crap. Now you have to understand…the Scot is an accountant. He’s hell on wheel when it comes to numbers but will break a light bulb off in the socket if he tries to change it. Subsequently, he’s fascinated by men who work with their hands, be they woodworkers, plumbers, mechanics…or in this case, a tinker. And the Scot is nothing if not frugal.

Fearing the worst, I wait. He says, “So I walked the vacuum over to him and told him he can have it.” He gives me a narrow-eyed look across the table. “I saw the bill for the Dyson.”

Oops! Did I mention I have a perchance for breaking vacuum cleaners?

Anyway,he continues as I turn scarlet, “I told him the Rikar’s a solid, expensive machine but has a broken switch, thinking he could fix it and make some money off it.”

Ah, reprieve!  “Aww, how sweet of you. It’s worth a good few dollars…if he can get it working again.”  The old man was forever under the hood of a battered pickup held together with wire and duct tape.

The Scot nodded. “Precisely what I was thinking after I learned how much the salesman said he’d give you as a trade-in toward a new Rikar.” (Which we both now knew was never going to happen in this lifetime.) “Anyway,” he continues, “an hour later I happen to drive by the old guy’s place and he had the vacuum in parts all over the yard.”

“So? He was fixing it.”

“No, he was reducing it to its smallest parts…to sell as scrap. That’s apparently what he does. He didn’t understand its intrinsic value. That if he’d fixed the switch---or whatever--he could have sold it for hundreds. All he saw when I gave it to him was the value of its steel and copper wire.” Scott shook his head and sighed. “Now he’ll only make a couple of dollars from it…and I’ve learned some people only know what they know. That some don’t see potential…can’t see beyond their experience.”

“I’m sorry, honey.”

Looking sad, he muttered, “Me, too.”

The Scot…one in a million.


To celebrate the June 5th print release of my 1285 Scotland-set historical, The King’s Mistress, I’m running a special contest and giving away EIGHT really great prizes. For details and prize list click on     

I hope you enjoy my new Highlander tale based on actual events.

So do any of you tend to break stuff?


Thanks for being here and sharing a bit of your life with us, Sandy. If you haven't ready Sandy's books, you've missed a real treat. Be sure to pick up a copy of The King's Mistress, and also look for her previous books. You can find them all at Amazon


Kate R said...

It's a cute story, Sandy! Not quite as funny as the one about the dead raccoon.

The part about him making an appletini when he heard you cursing that is pretty amazing.

Nora said...

Your Scott sounds like he keeps you on your toes with his surprises. I'm sure he inspires you. I wish my desk area looked as neat as yours. Mine is the opposite and I'd never take a picture!

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Kate,*waving*
True,this tale isn't as funny, but I decided to give the guy a break, before posting Tale #3: The Hound Dog on June 20th. You won't believe it. As for the martini, he knows booze mellows me out...usually.

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Nora,
LOL. That photo was taken between books. When I'm on deadline the place looks like a ship wreck, books, post-it notes,and maps everywhere.

Maggie McGinnis said...

Hmmm ... a man who makes you martinis when you're upset - now that's a keeper! Cute story! :)

I had to laugh because all I wanted for my birthday last year was a new vacuum cleaner, but my hubby said, "If I buy you a vacuum cleaner for your birthday, I will never hear the end of it! There is NO going back from a vacuum cleaner present."

Congrats on your release! Can't wait to get my copy!

Jennifer Brodie said...

Hi Sandy!

A man who brings you green apple martinis can be forgiven his frugal side! And I can quite see you sipping a martini in that beautiful office - there's so much light from that big window!
Release day tomorrow? Congrats! Can't wait to read it - such a beautiful cover.

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Maggie,
LOL at your hubby's reaction to your request. Mine also cringes every time I mention I want something with a plug. They think it's some devious trick. :)

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Jennifer,
Thanks for stopping in. He's so sincere, I'm hard pressed to stay mad, even without martinis...or after that racoon incident.(Tale #1)

Yes, tomorrow's the big day for The King's Mistress. And I do enjoy my office's big windows. Loads of sunlight to work by and good views while ruminating. :)

Dr. Debra Holland said...

What a great story. Your husband is a wise man!

Sandy Blair said...

Thanks, Debra. I agree. And thanks for dropping by.

JackieIvie said...

Always great to read Sandy's stuff. About the vaccuum...I bet the parts bring in a bit of money, though.

dstoutholcomb said...

great story...sometimes I wish stuff would break so I could get a replacement I really hubby named Scott, but not a Scot, is frugal, too...he's in denial I need a new vacuum (mine is 20yo)

Suzanne Ferrell said...

LOL, Sandy.

Great news on getting a Dyson though. I'm still trying to figure out how to con my son out of his. He got custody of it in the boy!

AutumnFire said...

Hi from your old 'Plano' stomping grounds. What don't we break in my house? I've lost count. I've also gotten to the point where I either take it to get fixed or get the replacement rather than waiting on my spousal unit to take care of it. He's a dear, but engineers are just a whole 'nother breed! Anyway, I've had my e-copy of King's Mistress for some time now and loved it! Congrats on the print release.

Sheila (the bumper sticker gal)

Sandy Blair said...

hHi Jackie.
I'm sure the parts did, but certainly not the $200 he would have had had he fixed it.

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Dstoucholcomb,
Thanks for dropping in. Yikes! 20 yrs old is way past life expectancy for a vac. Good luck.

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Suzy,
Very smart boy. I love my Dyson. Warning: it has two filters. One they tell you about and one inside the ball. Both have to be cleaned on a regular basis or one day it stops working. No one told me about the one inside the ball! Cost me $85 at a repair shop to find out.

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Sheila!
I loved those bumper stickers!! LOL about your engineer hubby. My duaghter has come to the same conclusion. And I'm happy to hear you read the story and enjoyed it. Thanks.

Tori Scott said...

I have no idea how old my vacuum cleaner is. Old enough that I tend to sweep the rugs with a broom rather than vacuum them.

$85 to find out about a filter? Yikes!

Lynn R. said...

I too, have a penchant for destroying vacuum cleaners (I think I have at least two, if not three broken ones in my storage!). Therefore, I also tend to prefer hardwood floors rather than carpet, simply for the ease of cleaning!!

If I did live somewhere that carpets, I would LOVE to have a Dyson, but realistically, given both the price of them and my ability to destroy the blasted things, it ain't happening.

Looking forward to the Hound Dog tale!!



Sandy Blair said...

Serious yike, Tori. I was not impressed.

Sandy Blair said...

Hi Lynn,
Nice to know I have a sister in vacuum crime. I suspect you'll enjoy the Hound Dog :)

Karilyn Bentley said...

Hi Sandy,
Cute story! I have a Dyson too. It's a great vacuum cleaner! The Hubster got it with reward points so it was free. Sorta. :) Lots of luck with your book release! I loved the story!!

Tori Scott said...

Sandy, thanks so much for being here today and sharing a slice of your life with that handsome Scot!